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By Janine

5 Easy Ways to Cultivate Sibling Friendships

Filed Under: BLOG, Family Life, FTSF, lists, parenting Tagged With: Family Advice, FTSF, Photo Share, Sibling Relationships

*This Sibling Friendships Photo Sharing article contains Amazon links. Please note, as an affiliate marketer for them, clicking and purchasing from these links results in me making a small commission from this action.

Can you order a book from the book order for me?

That was the simple question asked of me early one morning recently by my younger daughter.

See the monthly Scholastic book order for her class was due that week. She had been looking at one of the Diary of the Wimpy Kid books in the book order.

Diary of A Wimpy Kid The Getaway

However, same daughter had just started the Dork Diary series the evening before.

According to this same younger daughter she wanted to read Dork Diaries, because her older sister starting to read the series the year before in 2nd grade. So, she wanted to do the same.

Dork Diaries Front Cover

However, she wanted to “Gold” colored book in the series. We didn’t have that one in our library. We must have borrowed if from the public library.  She wanted to buy the book though.

Still this book wasn’t offered in the Scholastic order right now. So, tears as she wanted a book from the book order. But still wanted the Gold Dork Diaries book, too.

Since she had to get ready for school, I quieted her on this issue by telling her we would discuss further after school.

Flash forward to after school. Both girls came home from school. My older daughter was excited to share some news. She held an item behind her back to surprise her kid sister.

What was her surprise? 

She took the “Gold” Dork Diaries book out of the school library. See it was her library day for the week. Since our older daughter is in 3rd grade she is now officially allowed to take out Dork Diaries from the school library. Little sister still in 2nd grade technically is not. So big sister told little sister, “I took the “Gold” Dork Diaries book out for you to read, because I knew you wanted it. But I also knew you still can’t take it out being only in 2nd grade.”

Dork Diaries Open Book

The look on my older daughter’s face as she shared this news with her little sister was absolutely priceless. She was so proud of herself. Why? Because she just wanted to do something nice for little sister to make her happy.

Dork Diaries Inside Book

In that moment, I thought to myself that I must be doing something right. Then I witnessed my younger daughter not only hug and thank her big sister. But I also heard her say, “You filled your bucket.” 

They are taught also in school to be bucket fillers. In kindergarten our school, reads this book, “Have You Filled a Bucket Today?”, to the kids and instills this in the kids over and over throughout the years.

Have You Filled A Bucket Today

So, I couldn’t agree more this was bucket filling to its fullest. But just sibling style.

Girls getting to enjoy Ghostbusters on DVD and a snack, too

Don’t get me wrong, my girls are sisters. Meaning that they do get along. And yet they also have their sisterly fighting moments. But overall, it is times like this that reminds me that their sibling bond is so very strong.

[clickToTweet tweet=”Are your kids friends? Find out how to help them be better friends. #FTSF” quote=”Are your kids friends? Find out how to help them be better friends. #FTSF” theme=”style1″]

How have we helped to teach and continually cultivate their positive sibling friendships?

Read on to find out now how to grow and embrace sibling friendships….

5 Easy Ways to Cultivate Sibling Friendships

5 Easy Ways to Cultivate Sibling Friendships

1. Give them enough time to play together.

My two girls are honestly each other’s best friends. Don’t get me wrong they have their friends from school. But over the years, we have made sure that their sibling is the first and foremost friend. Meaning that if they do have a playdate with a friend at our own home, we make sure that they are still including their sibling in this outing. Still when they aren’t with another friend, my girls are also each others built in friend, too.

Girl_Scouts_Build_A_Bear

2. Spend time together with them, too.

While I make sure that my girls have more than enough time alone together, I also make it a habit to join in sometimes still, as well. This way, we are enjoying each other. But they also get their time to spend with mom, as well.

3. Make sure they know they need to respect each other.

I try often to let my girls work out their issues when they arise. However, I am here if they do need when they have their moments. Meaning that I have over the years, I have made sure to stress that they respect one another. But if they aren’t I am still here to jump in to remind them, too.

The Girls Christmas Morning

4. Let then have their own time and/or way to help one another.

Like the above book issue, my older daughter knew that she could help her sister. She has learned time and again in her short life that she is her little sister’s protector and helper. Conversely, my younger daughter also very much has her older sister’s back if and when need be. Simply this is because both my husband and I have continually cultivated this atmosphere in our home with both our girls.

Wilderness Lodge Disney with the Girls Posing in Front of the Fountain

5. When sibling acts of kindness do occur, make a big deal about them.

Once again, when the above act of book kindness occurred, I immediately let my older daughter know just how happy and proud of her I was for acting the way she did. Plus I not only allowed my younger daughter to get the Dirt of a Wimpy Kid book she had first been interested in, I also had my older daughter go through the book order to pick her own book to read and enjoy, too. So, positive reinforcement in these acts of kindness moments are key in helping to have them occur again and again.

Girls in front of Tree at Epcot in Norway

There you have 5 easy and simple ways to help your kids have real sibling friendships with each other. 

**This was written for this week’s FTSF with Kenya and Kristi, where we were to share a photo and story behind it. The photos of the book and of my girls loving on each other are all to help to share about the sibling friendships that both my girls have with one another.

Are your kids friends?

How have you helped to cultivate sibling friendships in your home?

Share with me in the comments…

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About Janine

Janine is a published author of the books, The Mother of All Meltdowns and Only Trollops Shave Above the Knee. She has been featured on The Huffington Post, Mamapedia, Today Parenting Team and SheKnows. She also runs her own graphic design company at J9 Designs.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Dara says

    April 27, 2018 at 8:17 am

    That was so sweet of your 3rd grader to take the book out for your 2nd grader! They are so lucky to have each other.

    • Janine says

      April 27, 2018 at 9:50 am

      Dara, I am a bit bias I suppose. But still couldn’t agree with you more 🙂

  2. William Holland says

    April 27, 2018 at 9:48 am

    The voice o experience is a powerful teacher. You’ve done a great job with your daughters, Janine. Bravo!
    Happy Weekend to you and your family!

    • Janine says

      April 27, 2018 at 9:50 am

      I agree that is most definitely a powerful teacher. that said, thanks Bill always and happy weekend to you and Bev, too 🙂

  3. Kenya G. Johnson says

    April 27, 2018 at 10:04 am

    Awww, the before story was sweet. It’s nice that they are close in age and learning the same things in school to apply them with one another.

    • Janine says

      April 27, 2018 at 10:06 am

      Kenya, these two really are as close as can be. I truly sometimes can’t believe they aren’t twins as to how close they are. I mean I most definitely know they aren’t. But still, they really are just that close <3

  4. Lisa@TheGoldenSpoons says

    April 27, 2018 at 1:23 pm

    Aw! So sweet!!! When we found out we were having girls (and then an third girl), lots of people told me they would be such good friends. I only had a brother, so I didn’t really get it. It do now, though! Believe me, there has been plenty of fighting and years when I was certain that “best friends” thing was a total myth. The last couple years, though, my girls have really, truly become friends with one another. They help each other & look out for one another. Almost make me forget all the fighting – almost! 😜

    • Janine says

      April 27, 2018 at 1:56 pm

      Aw, Lisa trust me we still have our moments trust me. But I do love seeing that overall those moments are thankfully fleeting and my girls do love each other fiercely. But those moments don’t always get forgotten as easily here either! 😉

  5. Tamara says

    April 27, 2018 at 2:40 pm

    That is incredibly sweet! Also the author of the diary of a wimpy kid series is my friend’s neighbor. You can meet him easily around here! I’ll have to check out Dork Diaries.
    My two are NOT friends at home, but better outside the home. They need each other!

    • Janine says

      April 27, 2018 at 2:45 pm

      Omg, I am so jealous now. Seriously, I read some of his earlier books even before my kids were born honestly. So, now that they are reading them I am excited to share this with them. But to have the author live so close is awesome! And what can I say my I love that your kids also need each other <3

  6. Bri Adams says

    April 27, 2018 at 3:24 pm

    That’s so cute! It’s wonderful they are such good friends and that’s such a sweet story about the library book. My 2nd grade daughter loves the Dork Diaries too.

    • Janine says

      April 27, 2018 at 7:46 pm

      Thanks Bri and I think Dork Diaries is definitely becoming a new young girl’s favorite chapter book series 🙂

  7. Kristi Campbell says

    April 27, 2018 at 6:57 pm

    So sweet that she was thinking of her sister on library day. I love that story and the photos are priceless. They’re adorable, Janine! Glad you linked up 🙂

    • Janine says

      April 27, 2018 at 7:46 pm

      Thanks Kristi and you know I just love joining with you guys when I can always 🙂

  8. Christine Carter says

    April 27, 2018 at 7:37 pm

    Aw Janine, what a beautiful story! Your girls are so precious and adorable and I’m so glad you shared this and offered these wonderful nuggets of advice. Thank you!!

    • Janine says

      April 27, 2018 at 7:47 pm

      Thanks Chris and truly was so happy to get to share this recent happening here and relate to sibling advice/help, too.

  9. clark says

    April 27, 2018 at 10:28 pm

    what a nice thing to have happen (and what excellent kids you have).
    I will admit my first thought was ‘love of reading is truly one of the most important things a parent can provide for their child. Not merely the ability to read, the love of it.
    I can still remember trips to the library on Friday nights with my mother when I was in grade school. Not so sure why it was Friday nights but can picture the old building and everything.
    Good upbeat FTSF

    • Janine says

      April 28, 2018 at 7:56 am

      Thanks Clark and I definitely couldn’t agree more as I love that my girls have such an immense love for books and reading 🙂

  10. Pat B says

    April 28, 2018 at 1:41 am

    Awwww! What a great post. It is always wonderful to read or see those times when siblings truly want to do something special for the other one. That kind of love strengthens the whole family.

    • Janine says

      April 28, 2018 at 7:56 am

      Thanks Pat and definitely couldn’t agree more 🙂

  11. Cynthia says

    April 30, 2018 at 10:25 am

    I meant to get over here when I saw this – I love, love this post on so many levels: the love, the compassion, the giving, the bucket-filling. You are raising two lovely young ladies who are going to impact the world in positive ways. You also have a big heart, you work hard, and all your ethics and motivation are rubbing off on your girls – it’s evident. Good job, Mom! And great job to big sis for looking out for little sis. 🙂
    And well…I cannot, CANNOT believe they’re in 2nd and 3rd grade already. I’ve been ’round these blog parts since before they started preschool. 😱 Time flies. Whewee!

    • Janine says

      April 30, 2018 at 10:41 am

      Aw, thank you Cyndi. This one was really just a labor of love to write. I am so proud of my two. Don’t get me wrong, they aren’t perfect by any means. But still I see how much they have grown and what big hearts they have. So, that really does in turn make my own heart swell. That said, I also cannot believe how quickly they have grown. Hugs and thank you for reading and being a friend for as many years as you have <3

  12. Jen says

    April 30, 2018 at 1:10 pm

    This is so sweet, and such great tips! I love seeing my kids acting like friends and not siblings!

    • Janine says

      April 30, 2018 at 2:44 pm

      Me too, Jen! So this was truly something my heart soared writing here 🙂

  13. AnnMarie John says

    May 2, 2018 at 11:58 pm

    Once again, some great tips. Surprisingly Madison and my oldest are the best of friends, even though there’s a 16yr difference between them. Having them spend time together is one sure way for them to build that friendship.

    • Janine says

      May 3, 2018 at 6:52 am

      Aw, love that Madison and your oldest are that close, too 🙂

  14. Bev says

    May 7, 2018 at 6:18 am

    My sister is one of my best friends, and I hope one day my girls will be too! We’re still a ways from that since Liv is so small, but Eve absolutely adores her and I can see them playing and getting into mischief together as they get older.

    • Janine says

      May 7, 2018 at 6:44 am

      Aw, Bev I bet you your girls are going to be as close as can be. I still can recall when my youngest was born how much even in those first few months just how much my older adored my younger. So, even when they couldn’t technically play together the bond was strong, too. 🙂

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