Staring at a blank screen with a flashing cursor…
I know I want to write and convey here how my life has been anything but straight forward or simple this last week.
Don’t get me wrong, I hate sounding like I am whining or complaining or even venting, but I guess this post will be a bit of all three – I apologize in advance for this.
However, this really isn’t my style to be honest.
I am usually pretty damn good with sucking it up and just keep going.
This wasn’t always the case, as a teen I used to constantly find the negative in just about anything and spew whenever I could about it…
Actually, I can hear my mom telling me, in one instance (I was probably about 16 – girl and hormonal need I say more), “Can’t you just see the glass half full not empty for once?”
This is what I am talking about!!!I am not saying this moment defined me, but I do remember thinking after she said this to me that quite possibly I should try my best to indeed see life in general with a more positive perspective.
Not exactly saying rose colored glasses, but still at the very least, I didn’t always have to be Debbie Downer or just waiting to explode when the next problem arose.
So since my late teens, I have, for the most part, seen life and even what most would consider to be less then pleasing with a more positive spin.
Sometimes, even repeat to myself that things could always be worse and the glass is definitely more then half full!
[Tweet “Do you consider your #life as glass half empty or half full??”]
Trust me, I know I am lucky and life is relatively good.
I mean I grew up in a relatively normal, loving family. Did I have moments where I thought those people are crazy? Hell yes, but still they stuck with me through thick and thin – loving me even when I was unloveable at times.
Me with my parents as a baby back in the 70s
I married a man, who is my equal – honest, loving, my best friend and a wonderful father. Do we have our moments and fights? Again hell to the yes, but still I wouldn’t want to fight or makeup with anyone else.
Kevin and I – Summer 2014I am the mom to two beautiful girls, who are perfect in my eyes (yes I know they aren’t at times, but still they are mine and to that end perfect). So, again for all the crazy times, I wouldn’t trade these two for the world.
Becoming a mom for me did change my outlook that much more.
On that end, if you are a friend on Facebook or even follow my blog, then you know that Emma had been pretty sick from last week.
Like I said try my best to see the positive in things, but healthcare I can’t help but question in recent times and have shared more then a few of my issues in the last few years, like when Emma had RSV pneumonia or my issues with having an IUD put in for birth control.
So, why anything about my kids getting sick when dealing with doctors and more would shock me is beyond me.
Long story short, we had to visit doctors (twice to her own pediatrician and once to urgent care after hours) three times in almost a week’s time, before she finally got diagnosed as having pneumonia.
To say this past week has been anything short of insane is understatement.
I somehow though made it through the week with my sanity intact (barely) between running back and forth to the doctor, trying to get Emma better with over the counter medicine and even keeping her from falling behind in school work (yes this is kindergarten). And by the way, this isn’t even covering taking care of the rest of us or with my own jobs of blogging and designing, too.
That is until…
It was the morning, Emma was finally ok to go back to school. I made sure to get her folder ready the night before with all her made up work, plus include her note for lunch (as to what she was buying for the day) and even put her snack bag together.
But when I went to get her ready in the morning, the first thing I realized was it was library day. So, I went to grab the Frozen book she took out over two weeks ago on the last library day she was in school for and realized it wasn’t there.
I began to panic.
Crazy and stupid thing to panic over, but still couldn’t help it. After asking calmly and then not so calmly, it was found on our kitchen table under Kevin laptop.
Then, the rest of my insane morning began to play out with me trying to get breakfast into her, so she could have her antibiotic before leaving for school. This medicine needs to be shaken before given to her. So, I did that and opened the cap just enough to have it loose looking for the medicine cup to give it to her in and also am pretty sure I was straightening up the kitchen counter, as well, at the same time.
When I went to grab for the medicine again, I totally forgot that I had already slightly opened the cap and shook the bottle again.
And white chalky mess was had by all…
In case you were wondering, the kitchen floor, the counter I was just straightening up and my clothes were all covered in what looked like matte, white paint. Yup, I had kid’s antibiotic all over my kitchen and myself, too.
I stood there for about 10 seconds, before I just started to bawl and couldn’t even manage to put myself back together right away.
Totally less then perfect, half glass empty moment from me and yet…
Here is where I know I am lucky, because Kevin cleaned up my mess (the medicine and even dealt with calling to get her more medicine for the rest of the antibiotic schedule), got Emma’s first of two doses for the day into her and even dealt with my meltdown.
So, even after my less then stellar performance as Emma and Lily’s mom that morning, as well as acting like a wife straight out of a horror movie, both girls more then forgave me and pretty much had forgotten about it by that afternoon, as well as Kevin calling me from work about an hour later and was not even annoyed at me. Yes, I did apologize to him, but still he was for the most part over it and just wanting to know how I was. Thank god for both Kevin and the girls when all else fails!
When all else fails my glass is half full, because of my gang!
Moral of this tale…
I guess sometimes I have to concede that I can’t do it all, definitely can’t please all the people all the time and just accept that I am definitely not perfect and make my fair of mistakes/messes quite often.
And in the end how it definitely should be!!And still my glass is most definitely half full not empty by any means.
So, tell me do you tend to see the glass half full or half empty?
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Alison says
I’m so sorry you’ve been having a hard time 🙁
Yay for an awesome husband and great kids! I hope Emma is better.
Amanda @ Growing Up Madison says
Sounds like you had a bad start of a day but it got better which is good. I’m shocked that it took 3 visits to diagnose poor Emma, but I’m also happy that she’s getting better. You’re always so positive and have been such a great friend, here’s a full glass this weekend!
Ginny Marie says
Oh, Janine, I can’t believe it took so long to get a diagnosis for Emma! And still you’ve been so good about commenting on each of my nablopomo posts, even the boring ones! I’m glad Emma has been able to go back to school, and I bet she’s happy too.
Jennifer | The Deliberate Mom says
Awww, I wish I could give you a hug. I’m sorry things have been rough lately. It’s important to be gently with yourself too, because you’re right, you can’t do it all and more importantly, no one expects you to do it all.
I just love your photos – what a gorgeous family you have.
Wishing you a lovely weekend.
xoxo
The Dose of Reality says
Oh, this brought tears to my eyes. Sometimes, even when you have trained yourself to be a “glass is half full” girl, it’s all to overwhelming. Sometimes you’ve just had enough and it all comes out (like medicine all over your counter). I’m so glad that you have a true partner who gets it…and gets you…and can be the calm and loving force to help fill your glass back up to half full when you need it–as I’m sure you do for him when he needs it.
I’m glad that Emma is better. Pneumonia is the worst!! I’m glad she’s back on her feet! –Lisa
Ps. Your blog looks beautiful! I love the new touches!!
Joy @ Yesterfood says
Thank you for such a sweet, honest post. Anyone who has had kids has been right there with you, and not handled it half as well (ahem to self!) ♥ It really does build up, and then what do you know- everyone is wearing antibiotic. 🙂 Love you, Janine!
Seana Turner says
I’m with you on this one. Typically try to be a positive person, but I have my meltdowns like anyone else. I give that Kevin a gold start for swooping in and cleaning up the antibiotic. That stuff is so hard to get, having it all over the room feels like lost gold!! When I hear a story like this, it always reminds me of how hard it is for Moms out there who are doing the parenting thing alone. It isn’t easy. Here’s to a happy, smooth, healthy day:)
This Busy Life says
Thank you for your honest post. I too am a mom of two perfect girls. Funny how we are both so blessed 😉 We’ve all had days like this. Thankfully our kids remember the good, not the bad. Carry on with your glass half full!
Jan Moyer says
Sometimes it’s a series of big things (like pneumonia) and sometimes it’s just putting on winter boots for the first time. Thankfully we always get a do-over. Being a parent is hard. Thanks for being transparent.
Echo says
I always say, “It doesn’t matter if the glass is half full or half empty, as long as there’s enough!
Bill says
I’m pretty sure we can all relate….things build up, and then it is one, seemingly unimportant event that cracks our defenses and leaves us a sobbing mess. You are doing the best you can and that’s all you can do. So sending you a big old hug and a wish for a brighter day today, Janine.
Karen says
So sorry your daughter was so sick! I know it’s awful when your kids are sick and you can’t make them comfortable. I think as Mom’s we put all the pressure on ourselves to be perfect and take care of everything. When my daughter was a newborn I really took this to the extreme and ended up sick and exhausted. My husband says that I can be a negative “glass half-empty person” but I always say that I’m just being realistic. I do see his point and I try really hard to be positive for my daughter’s sake. At least we balance each other out!
karen says
LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE that fall pic of all of you…too cute. I once saw a graphic that explained the glass was indeed full…1/2 liquid and 1/2 air…therefore full. From that moment on, I see it and life as full of possibilities, changes, and differences, but amazing.
Chris Carter says
AW babe!!! I totally deserve to have your meltdowns!!! I would have definitely lost it at that point too… and I just adore that Kevin for coming through and diving in to help!!! You are all about being HALF FULL and yet- I think it’s perfectly good and important to call that damn glass HALF EMPTY some days…
All the while knowing just how full it really is.
Lisa @ The Golden Spoons says
What a week! You deserved that meltdown and I think I might have had one to in that situation. I hope Emma is still on the mend and that you can enjoy your weekend!
Michelle AKA Crumpets and Bollocks says
I go through phases on the empty full thing, but I see nothing wrong with venting over a bad day with a miniature poor me marathon. Self-pity is the only pity we get sometimes, even when we deserve pity more than most. But at some point, you have to just chuck the glass at the fire place and say, “I don’t care if it’s happy empty or half full, eff that glass, I’m getting a new one.”
Jhanis says
Hugs! So sorry you had a tough week! But it’s okay to bawl it out once in a while you know, than bottle it up and keep the resentment and anger inside. Life is crappy sometimes! But you know what? You are a great mama! Smile! And to answer the question, I will have to ask, what’s in the glass? tequila? coz I need a shot. 🙂
Carrie Groneman says
Janine, I can so relate to this post and I thank you for your honest assessment of the day. Isn’t it interesting how easily our family forgives us! What a blessing they are and that you are to them. So glad the girls are on the mend, the medicine is cleaned up and now you can sit back and have a treat. Carrie, A Mother’s Shadow
Kenya G. Johnson says
Lately for me there’s just a chip in the glass and I suppose that happens right around the time I need to have a meltdown of my own. I think I’m due for a good cry but I don’t want to make a mess getting one. Do you at least feel better? I hope Emma has bounced back as well. 😉 One time I did have a similar meltdown when my husband was deployed. I was in the process of putting groceries away. I had bought stuff for baking cookies to send overseas. The was a deadline for mailing stuff for it to get there by Christmas. Christopher was thankfully at daycare when I dropped a bag of flour on floor. It literally exploded. I left it there to go lay across the bed and cry.
Another time is more of an “oh sh!t”, I was at home alone as a teenager getting ready to paint my toes. Like you I’d forgotten that I had already shaken it and the top was loose. It was literally a splash of it everywhere wall, carpet, table, sofa! Ugh. I did manage for it not to look “as bad” by the time my parents got home. They forgave me but the story is not forgotten 😉
Robin (Masshole Mommy) says
We’ve all been there and all I can say is hang in there because it WILL get better.
Kristi Campbell says
Awww Janine! What a hellish week – I cannot believe it took so so long for them to diagnose Emma!! Ugh! At least she’s on the mend now and able to go back to school. I can just picture the the white chalky mess that was your kitchen. That was awesome of Kevin to have cleaned up the mess and believe me, I’d have had a tantrum too!
ruchira says
gosh! what a day!
Have been there and done that with meds like these that I forgot the cap was partially open…blah!!
Times like the above…glass is half empty, but then when family comes and takes over the situation…glass is half full 🙂
hugs, Janine!!
Christy Birmingham says
Awww! I think we all have those moments. Kevin and your girls are always there for you to pick you up when it happens xx I send you a big hug!!
Jen says
Pneumonia, no! That’s terrible! I think your concession is a wise choice, sometimes that is all we can do. I love that your Kevin helped you fix everything, what a great husband and Daddy! P.S. Your Mom looks so much like you 🙂
Diane Roark says
Janine,
OH, How I wish I could give you a hug. LOTS AND LOTS OF HUGS!! I love your post, but I am so truly sorry for your super bad week.
Blessings,
Diane
Kim says
OH, so sorry- having sick kids is so hard and then dealing with Drs/healthcare makes it brutal!!!
Glad Kevin was able to deal with the issues from the meltdown – I feel fortunate that Chris is the same way.
I live the wine cards – especially that last one – so very true!!!
Bev says
Aw, mama, don’t be too hard on yourself! We’re human and we have these moments. I could totally relate to your bawling….I probably would have done the same thing! Thank you, though, being so open and honest. It’s always nice to hear these real mom moments. We’ve all been there. And glad Emma is feeling better 🙂
Dana says
I’m sorry you’ve had such a tough week, Janine. Let’s hope that’s it for sickness this winter! By the way, your redesign looks wonderful – so simple and clean.
Kelly L McKenzie says
The corker was the loose lidded medicine bottle, wasn’t it? Ouch. I can so relate. This would happen to me in a heartbeat. Of course you had a meltdown. It was the final straw. I am so happy new meds were ordered and she was sent off to school with the proper dosage. Yikes. I am also delighted that you finally got to the source of the problem with Emma and that she is feeling better. Nice work Mom.
Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life says
Oh Janine. We all have those days and moments and I totally understand and you have my sympathy. I am sure I would have been at wits end in the same situation and do frequently lose it when everything that can go wrong does. We had an issue with pneumonia way back where my daughter was sick and lethargic for weeks upon weeks and they couldn’t find anything wrong with her. Now she has always been just a bundle of energy from day 1 so I knew something was wrong but they were telling me she had nothing wrong. After numerous doctors visits, they finally ran a test for pneumonia and sure enough, that’s what it was. And you know about my son’s story from our book. So I get it. Sending hugs your way.
Tamara says
Sometimes being a mom breaks us open. And sometimes it’s the very thing that holds us together!
So my sister tells this funny story one day of walking into the kitchen and seeing me shake a glass of ice water into the air and all over myself. That’s what she saw without initially knowing why. Then she noticed I had a glass of ice water in one hand, and a bottle of antibiotics in the other.
I sheepishly said, “I thought I was shaking the antibiotics!”
The lid WAS closed but I still managed to shake a glass of water instead.
Rea says
Most of the time half full! I’ve missed hearing from you, thank God for Facebook. I hope Emma is doing okay and you too! Seriously though, some mornings before I go to work, I have mini-meltdowns and just because I don’t want to start my day bad, I do my best to put myself together and move on. It’s not easy but it must be done. And I totally agree with you in accepting the fact that we aren’t perfect but at least to our family, we are. 🙂
Alexis @ BabyStuff.tips says
We all have those moments where it all becomes too much. Cry, yell, and/or rant, then once it’s all out you can pick yourself back up again. Sending virtual love and hugs <3 xoxo
Leah says
What a week! I hope Emma feels better and I hope you do too! Sometimes being a mom is the most overwhelming thing… So glad your hubby is such an awesome support! Big hugs!
Anna Fitfunner says
A definitely tough week! But you’ll get through it (you already have by the time that you’ll read this!) and continue to enjoy your glass-is-totally-full family! Big Hugs!
Stephanie @ Mommy, for Real. says
Oh, you’re not alone! We all have those horrible days, and it’s OK to be upset and complain and even yell or cry… it doesn’t take away from the fact that of course at the end of the day gratitude for our families always wins. And speaking of new looks… it is GORGEOUS around here! You’ve done a beautiful job with this site! xoxo
Stephanie @ Life, Unexpectedly says
This was definitely a day where whatever not fluid-filled portion of the glass needs to be filled with wine or vodka! I’m glad Emma was eventually diagnosed and is doing better now! Our neighbors’ twins had pneumonia last year, and it took the doctors weeks to diagnose it because the symptoms were abnormal.
I agree that sometimes it’s hard to be positive, but no matter what, a good laugh can sometimes make things ten times better again!
Have a wonderful weekend, Janine!
Aunt Gloria says
I think I would have had more than a meltdown after the week you had! Now I heard Emma fell and had a bloody nose and you’re waiting for results that nothing was broken. When it rains, it pours. But keep the focus on the glass half full because you have a loving support system, and you will look back on this in the near future, have a shiver and then smile! Love you…..see you tomorrow 🙂
Rosey says
I did see that your daughter was sick. 🙁 We’ve all had our days…and speaking of library books, we left one on the restaurant table on accident awhile back. I called to tell them when we got home and they said it wasn’t there. I called back two days later, and still nothing. grr. We had to buy The Cat in the Hat. I thin k the bus boy threw it out (just a hunch). Whatever happened… I’m still a little miffed it wasn’t just turned in to the lost and found…. but this too, shall pass. 😉 We all have those days/times/weeks. 🙂 Hugs just the same.
Katherines Corner says
You my sweet friend are a good soul, forever marked by the light you shine. Yes, you had a moment, a mini melt down. I feel you and I send hugs and then I say, “your gang filled it up and there you have it, half full and all is right with the world again”. Terrific post sweet Janine. Sorry you had a bumpy road , happy that your little one well again and that you have the love of family to fill your glass. xoxox
lisacng @ expandng.com says
Definitely sounds like a rough week and morning getting her ready to go back to school. It’s great to have a loving and helpful and forgiving husband to help you when you need it. I think I’m pretty “half full” kinda person but I have my limits. At a clothes store this past weekend, I nearly lost it with J because he refused to keep trying-on winter gear. I wasn’t very pleased with O either because she was fussy, but who can blame her when she was missing her nap, thirsty (forgot her water bottle) and hungry (not enough snacks packed). Though it wasn’t my best moment, at least it’ll push me to go out more prepared next time :).
Brittnei says
I definitely see things in a positive light I would say 95 percent of the time. My small times of being negative seem to be somewhat how you described here. I might have a random bad day. I find that when I’m pregnant I say more of what I don’t mean and tend to have to apologize later. My husband isa great sport about it and never seems to think it’s a big deal. He is very used to these pregnancy emotions I guess.
Tara Newman says
I hear ya friend…Standing right beside you in the thick of messy mommyhood. PS. you look JUST like your mother! Cheers to a better week!
Nellie @ Brooklyn Active Mama says
What an insane week! When it rains it certainly does pour. I have had my weeks like this when it seems like everything could go wrong—does!! But you have managed to keep such a positive attitude and you managed it perfectly–not to mention you ran your other business in a fantastic way! Thank you!
Rabia @TheLiebers says
My husband and I just had this conversation this morning! I always see the glass as half full. He sees the glass as having been stolen from him! I tell him that even after all these years of putting up with him, I still have hope that one day he will have a more positive outlook. So far he’s still my Eeyore!
Also, I want you to know that I have done the EXACT SAME THING with antibiotic before. Only ours was pink and not white. WHAT A MESS!!!
The Pinterested Parent says
Sorry sweet lady that you had such a rough week. We are also battling sickness over here. It has not been fun. None of us can do it all. We can just do the best that we can & I know that you do that. I do love your ecards. I hope you got to enjoy a full glass of wine after your tough week. Cheers!
Camille says
I would have had a breakdown too! I have more than my share of breakdowns. But generally I always stay positive. Even at the worst times, I know how lucky I am, and how lucky our family is. So I can honestly say I’m a half full kind of girl!
I hope Emma is all better now!! It’s the worst when our babies are sick. 🙁
Catherine Gacad says
big hug to you, janine. we all have our meltdowns! it’s actually really refreshing to read other people’s problems. sometimes i think it’s just me! glad our husbands are around to be our partners in crime 🙂
lynne says
Hi, I guess all mom’s pass through the same super woman syndrome every now and then, yes, we have to accept that we can not do everything. We are only human, good to know that everything went smoothly at the end of the day. Thanks for sharing. Positive post indeed!
Sherill says
Great to hear that your daughter is doing better and you too! Yes I believe if we look at things – as the glass being half full rather than half empty then we bring forth positive vibes and chances are things will go better for us, but if not don’t fret as your day will turn up to be better.
Janine says
Thanks Sherill and definitely couldn’t agree with you more on this if I tried!!