Hearts, Roses,Valentine’s, oh my!!
But I hate Valentine’s day!
There I said it and ripped that band-aid off – just plain, simple, direct and to the point.
As a mother (and wife, too) have grown to loathe and disdain this Hallmark, made up holiday with all my might and power.
Why you may ask am I so hostile towards this sugar coated day?
Find out now why I say, “Down with Hearts for Mom”
1. Ode to the Hearts
There are just so many of them and they are everywhere since the moment the clock struck 12 on December 26th, I cannot escape them. Even my youngest daughter keeps asking me to draw the perfect heart all damn day long. Don’t get me wrong, I love to draw, even if I am not the next Picasso, but still If I never draw another heart again, I’d be happy.
But still all I see is hearts everywhere I go and even in my nightmares sleep!
2. More Homework for Mom with Kids Valentine’s Cards
Seriously, who came up with making kids have to write one out for each kid in their class. I want to find this person and throttle them.
I just had to fight a sick, 5 1/2 year old kid with strep throat (It is February, illness galore, more sick notes coming from the school nurse daily, so this was bound to happen) to sign her name to 20 cards and am so over it!
As if I don’t have enough to do with her being in kindergarten and the common core curriculum breathing down my neck with made up and imaginary homework, now I have to sit and force myself not to lose my shit when when my daughter is complaining with each and every signature. Cruel and unusual punishment for all parties involved if you ask me.
Enough said!
3. Nothing Says Love Like Mass Produced Love
As if writing those sappy Valentine’s cards out isn’t enough, I am still made to feel loads of guilt to buy Valentine’s for my loved ones.
Each year I swear I am not spending a dime on this made up commercialized holiday and then like clockwork I go into my local drugstore a few days before for something else and crack quicker then you can say crack spending an arm and a leg on greeting cards, chocolate hearts and more for family, friends and even the kids’ teachers, too.
When will I learn and let this so-called guilt finally die once and for all?
4. Revenge is a Valentine’s Dish Best Served Cold for Mom
This year, Valentine’s Day, just so happens to fall on a weekend night – A Saturday night, when I usually don’t cook and either bring takeout in or dare to go out someplace to attempt (key word here for most moms) a hot meal cooked by someone other then me.
Don’t even get me started on trying to find a babysitter on cupid’s finest night.
So, now I get to fight large crowds and pay double the cost to be unhealthy, dragging two kids out not even to even enjoy a hot meal, because when the food finally does make its way to my table, like magic one of my kids will announce they need the bathroom just as that first morsel ironically touches my lips.
Ridiculous prices for not so good food, whiny kids – dinner and a show – sounds like a little slice of hell on earth covered up with hearts.
Fun Times and priceless!
5. Everything Is Coming Up (Expensive) Roses
I am all for beautiful flowers to be gifted to me , but still am I the only one who never truly got the reasoning behind gifting someone a plant that will just up and die only days later?
But still as if price gauging for food isn’t enough, then here comes the flowers. Nothing says romance like seeing the price tag for flora that will indeed die in less then a week, because my husband is a romantic at heart and I just so happen to keep track of all the money spent in our checking, as well.
So, my gift is here is what?
Feeling guilty for how much money was spent on a bouquet of flowers for yours truly that will be crooking in tee minus 7 days and counting!
Don’t get me wrong, I love romance just as much as the next person, but for moms (and don’t forget wives, too), especially all of the above reasons and more makes me want to start a petition to put an end to this made up holiday once and for all.
[Tweet “#Moms – Love it or hate it? #ValentinesDay”]
Who’s with me; as I devour my chocolates from that store bought plastic heart, swoon over my $75 barely alive roses, draw another perfectly drawn heart for the 4 year old, fight the 5 1/2 year old to John Hancock her last Valentine and most definitely not even get to enjoy my insanely expensive chilly meal.
And that my friends is Valentine’s Day for us moms.
As much as I doth protest too much, I am guilty of doing all of the above and more each damn year.
Why?
Because I am a glutton for punishment, who just so happens to also be a wife and mother, that loves her gang and can’t say no to them even though I am fully aware that is indeed a made up day.
So with that said…see you same time next year moms!
Robin (Masshole Mommy) says
I loathe Valentine’s Day. Hate, hate, hate it.
Janine says
Robin, thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing in my misery with me!
Liza Hawkins says
I think it’s sweet that the kids celebrate at school, but we don’t make a big fuss over it here at home.
Confessions of A Mommyaholic says
I think it is sweet in essence, too, but I just hate that it is so time consuming though.
Nellie @ Brooklyn Active Mama says
Not a fan. I was when I was a kid young and in love but now? Not so much. My son makes me draw hearts sometimes but it’s all good because usually they are for me! 🙂
Janine says
Nellie, some of those hearts are for me, but I am usually knee deep in cooking dinner, when Lily decides that she needs the perfect heart drawn right at that moment now! But seriously, I know I did love it when I was a kid, but as a mom who has so much on her plate not particularly a fan of all the added stress this day brings ether.
Seana Turner says
So true, Janine! You’ve got me laughing about the decorations being everywhere starting December 26th. It really has become commercial, like every other holiday. We are going out new weekend instead. The food and service will be better. I did enjoy making the Valentine’s, because I like crafts, but I agree that it is “one more thing” for Moms to do. And then, of course, you have to figure out what to do with all the Valentine’s cards when they come home from school. My advice is pitch them:)
Janine says
Seana, my husband actually just mentioned this morning about going out the weekend after for the first time this morning and think you all are onto something there. As for the cards afterwards, I am with you and toss them when no one is looking either! 😉
Tara Newman says
I am totally indifferent. I made reservations for us all to go out to dinner to celebrate together. My kids are old enough now to write their own valentine’s and they enjoy doing it. I can take it or leave it. I have a fundamental issue with the cost of greeting cards so I am making my own this year. – 3 year old style – crayons and construction paper.
Janine says
Tara, I love the 3 year old style and totally agred about the cost of greeting cards, in general – just crazy!!
Marcia @ Menopausal Mother says
I’m with you—not a fan of Valentine’s day. But also like you, the guilt creeps in at the last minute and I end up schlepping over to the drugstore for cards and candies. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a quick errand to run for my husband…..
Janine says
Marcia, you are totally excused and trust me like I said will so be there with you at some point today, too!! 🙂
Bill says
We don’t do Valentine’s Day, so I guess you know where I stand on this stupid day. 🙂 Have a great Friday, Janine.
Janine says
Bill, just one of the many reasons, I adore you and than you always for just being you! Have a wonderful Friday and weekend once again, too 🙂
Elena says
I think I’m somewhere in between disliking and hating Valentine’s day. The “drawing of the hearts” made me laugh out loud only because I can relate. Alivia asked me to draw hearts on all of her homemade Valentine day cards. And because the teachers encouraged us to have the kids make their cards this year, it was hell! As much as I love to craft, having Alivia draw in and create 15 cards with each person’s name and who it was from turned out to be more work than fun. In fact, it made both of us moody and angry as the pressure of getting all the cards done by an impossible deadline worsened with each day.
Oh, and I always tell my husband NEVER to buy me flowers on Valentine’s day! It is the biggest rip off ! Not to mention, I’m not a huge fan of flowers anyway; never was. My favorite flowers are tulips and he can buy those any other day of the year for only $7.99.
Since Livi is excited about the holiday, I do get her something, but the hubby and I do not do much. I don’t need an appointed day to celebrate our love. We celebrate it on the days we choose.
Anyhow, great post. I like your spin on Valentine’s, and you crack me up 😉
Happy Friday, and have a great weekend!
Janine says
Elena, I was so happy to see you here today and love that you could totally relate to this. I just don’t get how it is supposed to be fun to try and get our kids to make 15 cards themselves. And like you it only turns into a ton of pressure on the kids and us moms, too. As for flowers, I thought it was so just me, but as pretty as they are I really just feel like it is money I am throwing right into the garbage pail as they end up dying anyways. I also agree about celebrating love daily and not just on this one day of the year, because we are told to by Hallmark. Have a great weekend, too 🙂
Kathy Radigan says
Well I hate to be different but I love Valentine’s day. My dad always would buy my sisters and I a little something for the day and we would always have a fun dinner. Now that I”m a mom we do the same thing. and it’s still fun. I also have to say that Joe and I got engaged on Valentine’s Day 23 years ago!! Happy Valentine’s Day!
Janine says
Kathy, I can totally see why you love it and got to admit that if I got engaged in this day it would most likely hold sentimental memories for you, too. So, I totally get that and Happy Valentine’s Day to you, too 😉
Lauren Baker Cormier says
Seriously, it’s a LOT OF WORK when you’re a mom. It seems like, for school, it’s a bigger deal than Christmas (is that even possible??). The kids just had to bring one gift to exchange at Christmastime, but they need valentines for the whole class! 😛
Confessions of A Mommyaholic says
Lauren, I agree completely and since Christmas is more of a religious holiday we can’t even really celebrate it to the fullest and they make it more generalized with winter here in our public schools, but still can’t believe how grand of a celebration Valentine’s Day is for schools now.
The Imp says
I remember cutting the names from the list and gluing them on the cards. Grade one. And I got in crap for that. *sigh*
Janine says
Oh man, I so wish I could have done that! Seriously, is it wrong that I say you are my hero for that one?!! 😉
Alexa says
I dislike many of the things you mentioned, but it’s not really a holiday I care about too much. I enjoy the Valentine’s dinner my grandma does whenever she’s in town. That’s a special family time.
Janine says
Alexa, that does sound very special to me and can see why you would love having that family time together 😉
Dara says
I totally agree that Valentine’s Day is a made up Hallmark holiday! I’m so happy we don’t have to worry about cards and candy and all of that for the kids in school. I mean we do that sometimes for other holidays, but not this one!
Janine says
Dara, I am so jealous that you don’t have to worry about it. Seriously, just added more stress this past week to my life then you will ever know!!
Jhanis says
My husband just made plans for valentine’s day! He said he wants pasta for dinner. Which I need to cook! hahaha! I hate it when restaurants jack up their prices during valentine’s day! And the flowers! Ugh. I’d rather stay at home. Or wait for the traffic to clear up before heading out for a bottle of beer. Unless my husband falls asleep right after dinner. LOL
Janine says
Jhanis, I may very well fall asleep after dinner if I could, too!! 🙂
Bev says
I thought Valentine’s Day was great in elementary school — it was basically one big party in the afternoon with chocolate & candies and store-bought cards. Now I just see it as an excuse for people to charge a ton for flowers & a dinner out. I’ll save the romance for another night! 😉
Janine says
Bev, I know we can be romantic pretty much anytime we want and not just because the calendar and Hallmark says so. 🙂
Rabia @TheLiebers says
Benjamin loves writing his name. He writes it all day long. he apparently even wrote it on the bathroom floor at day care. When it came time for Valentines, however, he decided to go with “Ben!”
Janine says
Rabia, so does Emma, especially when she wrote it on my walls a few months back, but still when she has to do it like for cards, I get to here complaints galore!
lisacng @ expandng.com says
Totally agree with you, Janine! I don’t have to make a box with my kids this year for V-Day but I know the time is right around the corner and NO THANK YOU. Argh. I’ve asked my husband not to give me flowers for V Day because they are super overpriced and I’d rather have macarons from a special shop near us :). Have a great day, nevertheless. Hopefully you can do something special!
Janine says
Thanks Lisa and those macaroons sound heavenly to be quite honest 😉
Erin Dwyer Dymowski says
It’s not such a big deal in terms of valentines and parties as your kids get older, but it can be a hard day to be a teen, so you need to clear your schedule for emotional falllout.
Confessions of A Mommyaholic says
I truly don’t even want to think of the teens year with two girls here, because so many years later I still remember Valentine’s Day as a teen and definitely wasn’t pretty.
Susanne/The Dusty Parachute says
I enjoy it but I keep expectations nice and low. I made the kids little heart (canned) cinnamon rolls for breakfast and they were both (even the 5 year old) responsible for doing all their store-bought cards. I watched during my son’s pre-k Valentine exchange today and they couldn’t care less what the card was, they were just super excited to see their friends’ names and shout to them “I got a card from you!!!! Thank you, Billy!”
Janine says
Like I said on Facebook, now I am craving cinnamon rolls 😉
Susanne Lewis Kerns says
I enjoy it but I keep expectations nice and low. I made the kids little heart (canned) cinnamon rolls for breakfast and they were both (even the 5 year old) responsible for doing all their store-bought cards. I watched during my son’s pre-k Valentine exchange today and they couldn’t care less what the card was, they were just super excited to see their friends’ names and shout to them “I got a card from you!!!! Thank you, Billy!”
Confessions of A Mommyaholic says
I think maybe I just have to lower my expectations next year and now I want cinnamon buns, too 😉
Susanne Lewis Kerns says
We have some left over!
Confessions of A Mommyaholic says
Aww,man now you are just tempting me
Kim says
I’m right there with you – Valentine’s Day is not my favorite!!!
We aren’t even celebrating:) I told Chris a couple years ago that I don’t even need a card. I would rather get (and give) a card on a random day just because than to do one on a day that society deems the perfect day to show love.
I remember those days of signing the cards – pure torture for sure!!!
Janine says
Kim, those damn cards were indeed plain torture and now I just had them sign the card for Kevin and they were fighting over who was writing “Dear Daddy”. So, I just can’t win for trying, LOL!! 😉
Chris Carter says
AW!!! I can’t believe you don’t like Valentine’s Day Janine!! You have such a HUGE heart, I would have thought you would be ALL OVER IT!!
But I get it. The commercialism and the expensive flowers and all the hype. Not cool. But as much as I am not that over the top about any holidays really, I do enjoy this one- because it’s about love. I can do that. Even if it means helping the kids write the brutal valentine lists of names and decorate their boxes- which is a pain in the REAR- but I remember how much fun it was for me as a child. S o I love seeing my kids have that kind of fun!
It was a bit sad this year, because it was Cassidy’s first year to NOT have Valentines for her classmates and no parties either – such is middle school. So, try as best you can to dig deep and embrace those damn stinkin’ valentine parties and decorations and cards… I miss it already, and I’ve only got one kid left to enjoy it with for only two more years. Wow.
As for me and Derek? Well since we had a red rose valentine wedding on the 17th of this month- I suppose it all comes together for our celebration of us. Most years, that just means “YAY US!” lol But one year (yes just one) we got away for the night at my friend’s cabin. It was amazing.
That’s the pay off, I suppose! Pretty soon, there won’t be any more kid parties and little valentine cards to write- but maybe Derek and I will get AWAY from the kids more, as they get older!! 🙂
Janine says
Chris, I will let you in on a little secret most of what was hear was mostly my sarcastic humor, but deep down I had a very bad Valentine’s Day back in 1999, when we lost my grandfather, who I adored to pieces when he passed away on this day. So deep down, it has never been the same for me to be quite honest. That said, as much as this day just isn’t my most favorite I do the best for Kevin and the girls though, because they are all that matter to me.
Ginny Marie says
Chris, I volunteered for my fourth grader’s Valentine’s Day party, and as I was complaining about working so hard to prepare, I reminded myself that she only has one more school Valentine’s Day party! It’s sad to me!
Janine, I know how strongly you feel about Valentine’s Day. My grandfather passed away on February 15th, and I had rushed to be by his side before he died. It was heartbreaking.
Nevertheless, Happy Valentine’s Day to both of you!
Janine says
Thanks Christa for reminding me about your grandfather, too. And I also was there in the hospital room when mine passed away and most definitely why I feel as strongly as I do. I just try my best, but this day still is not an easy one for me and once I it is over each year can almost feel a sense of relief that it is (if that makes sense). Hugs to you and thinking of you, too.
Jen says
Haha!! So here’s your new plan…… I would order pizza in and set in on a blanket to make it a special picnic night and then put the girls to bed early and recover from the heart a plaooza!
Jen says
Um that would be palooza ! P.S. Happy Valentines Day my friend 🙂
Janine says
Totally knew what you meant and Happy Valentine’s Day, too!! xoxo 😉
Janine says
I love this plan and might just have to do this now, especially since it is supposed to snow again tonight here.
Janine says
Thanks Christy and couldn’t agree more and we do have more snow coming our way. Fingers crossed for not too much and that it is out of here quickly now. Hugs 🙂
Tamara says
Yup, same time next year! I actually do like Valentine’s Day, although if I had to give up all of winter, I’d give it up too, so how much do I really love it?
And making those valentines THE NIGHT BEFORE with Scarlet was a bit tedious, but I’ll feel worse when I’m doing them for two kids.. I’m sure.
Janine says
Tamara, I feel bad that I just don’t like it, but does totally stem from losing my grandfather on this day years back and as much as I try to leave in the past, I still can’t totally. And the girls though were so excited though today that I truly have faked it as best as I could for them.
April G says
Lol! I didn’t even consider cards this year. My son didn’t mention it and so neither did I! I hate the fact that. Your whole class has to be your valentine which inherently doesn’t make sense since being a valentine is a privilege… at least it used to be. Now its a mandate. I don’t hate Valentine’s Day. I think its kinda cute, but I don’t like the compulsory nature of something called love.
Janine says
April, I know it has really gotten out of hand having the whole class be everyone’s Valentine!!
Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life says
I am so with you on this one, Janine! It is definitely not my favorite holiday. Fortunately I am past a lot of this stuff, but I remember it.
Janine says
Thanks Michelle and I am seriously so happy that it isn’t just me!! 😉
Aunt Gloria says
I hope you managed to enjoy some of the day, after all, Janine. I agree….too much commercialism. Can’t believe Emma had to sign a card for every kid in her class! The teacher probably isn’t a parent! But now the day is over and hope you have a pleasant Sunday. I know the kids are off next week and more snow is coming your way. Take some time to relax and enjoy making snow angels! Love you……xxoo
Janine says
Thanks Aunt Gloria. Emma’s teacher is an absolute doll and I totally love her. She is also is a mom to triplets believe it or not, but this was more on the common core curriculum which is government sanctioned to make kindergarten more like first grade and having the kids be more and more advanced sadly. Love you too and hope you are enjoying your weekend, as well xoxo 😉
Aunt Gloria says
I’m glad to hear the teacher had to follow the curriculum, even though I have strong feelings about that! Not her fault. Hope you all had a fun day. We had a nice dinner party at the club house and a good time was had by all. Auntie Anne is home in Rochester now and I miss her. Oh well. Keep warm and safe! xxoo
Janine says
Aww, thanks again Aunt Gloria and thanks for keeping me posted about Auntie Anne. Have a great week, too xoxo 😉
Camille says
Yep, it’s not my favorite holiday either. I prefer anniversaries, they feel much more special because it’s our unique day. 🙂
Janine says
Camille, I love our anniversary as well and definitely more personal to me, too 😉
Pamela LIst says
I close my eyes and thank my lucky stars, My anniversary is Feb. 15th so we just pretend the 14th doesn’t really exist.
Pam
Janine says
Pam, if I could do that I so would 😉
Katherines Corner says
I understand your feelings and appreciate your frustration my friend. I hope you had a lovely weekend xox
Janine says
Aww, thanks Katie and some other of this is just my attempt at sarcastic humor and some is still just not being a fan as back in the day my grandfather passed away on the actual date. But appreciate you commiserating with me xoxo
Rosey says
Hubby and I get a small thing for each kid. We don’t exchange gifts together though. We did go out to dinner but only because it was Friday (we went the day before). The crowds were ridiculous even a day before.
Janine says
I can imagine the crowds and we ended up not dealing with crowds here after all thankfully.
Rea says
I normally don’t celebrate it. This year when I finally decided to celebrate, it’s such a nightmare! I did get to eat out with a friend but not with the husband (which was originally planned by me). THERE! I guess I won’t exert an effort anymore next year. LOL. But I remember back in high school & college, it was a big deal for me.
Janine says
Rea, I have learned to not to exert too much energy as it usually turns out terribly anyways!
The Pinterested Parent says
Valentine’s Day stresses me out too. I never know what to do for my hubby. I freak out about it every year. We had a quiet day & night this year.
Janine says
I know just does a number on me each year and not going to lie, so glad it is behind us once again.
Catherine Gacad says
this could be one of my favorite posts. you are so funny! the holiday is so contrived! i tell dean, do not waste money on buying me a flower or piece of chocolate. i will kill you!
Janine says
Catherine, I know it is truly ridiculous and thank you again! 😉