Welcome back to Finish The Sentence Friday Blog Hop (FTSF). We give you a sentence and you finish it (however long or short you’d like). Please feel free to link up and follow any or all of our hostesses, which are below.
Our Special Co-Host This Week Is (and so happy to have her joining us!):
Sarah Rudell Beach from Left Brain Buddha. So, please do visit her and show her some love today.
And now for this week’s sentence to finish: “The most unexpected part of being a grownup is…“
Next week’s sentence to finish: “What I really want to scream out loud is…”
The most unexpected part of being a grownup is…
Seeing how much things really do change regarding how you think of your parents once you do grow up.
See I find it fascinating and oh so interesting how things have changed so much from when I was little. Now that I’ve been in my thirties, the differences are glaring.
I remember spending whole days on the weekend glued to Saturday morning cartoons and trying to avoid doing “family stuff” with my parents. I was a child, after all, and it’s hard to pass up the latest Bugs Bunny episode over going to the park, where I would just sit around wishing I was back home.
But oh how the times have changed.
I guess that’s what maturity does to you and your relationship with the parents. You finally wise up and realize that you have a finite amount of time to spend with your loved ones. Likewise, you drop that teenage angst attitude and realize they’re actually really cool, down to Earth people with a lot to share.
Mom and I-2006 Before My Wedding (All Grown Up!)I absolutely love cooking a meal with my folks either on the grill or just in the kitchen (which is way better than the one at my apartment, that’s for sure). I have a complete blast going to the car shows around the area with my dad or running around town looking for sweet deals at yard sales with my mom.
In a lot of ways it feels like I never really grew up – though I am independent and have been for many years, now – but I guess it’s just this feeling that they’re not really just my parents anymore – they’re my friends.
Nowadays one of my favorite things to do on the weekends, often more so than going out with friends, is to spend time with my parents, sit outside (in the warmer, nicer weather), and talk about what’s going on. I remember this last time when we were out there for hours in the backyard last summer under the canopy, surrounded by lights, and thinking that it couldn’t be any better.
The way my mom had touched up the place with wind-chimes, plants, and lights (she told me you can find outdoor patio lights online) made it very Zen. We sat there for hours, catching up on what’s happening in our jobs, craft projects, relatives, siblings, and other family-related events.
To me this is far better than spending another night in front of the T.V. watching shows you don’t really care about.
I guess where I’m getting at with this article is that parenting seems to have a big payoff. I think my parents did a great job at raising me.
· They were patient
· They understood the need for alone time
· They encouraged my projects
I may not have shown my appreciation at all times because of angst and societal pressure put on by your peers throughout school, but all that has melted away and now our relationship is better than ever.
If you’re reading this and you’re feeling like you’re not bonding with your children – just hold out. Keep being an amazing mom or dad. Keep showing them unconditional love. Keep inspiring them to do great things. Keep instilling the value of family (without being too overbearing).
They will drop the antics. They will be there. In time, they will come around. I keep hoping this is true with my own kids and just do my best everyday now to be the best parent possible like my parents were with me, too.
And now that I shared what I have found the most unexpected part of growing up, please share your thoughts on this here with us today!
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Kelly L McKenzie says
Oooooh am I the firs? Perhaps not by the time I post this … Feeling rather chuffed that I am an early commenter though considering you are the most faithful at posting a comment on FTSF days for me!
I am with you on the parental front. I remember going to a movie with my mom when I was in my teens and worrying so much about whether we'd be seen. I grew up a weensy bit though and delighted in travelling with both my mom and my dad. I am grateful we had so much time together. It was a lot of fun.
Now that my two are big I still do things that mortally embarass them. I suspect I always will. However, they are happy to go to hang out with me when they are home and I treasure our time together.
Janine Huldie says
Woohoo!! You are totally first and look at you rocking the comments tonight. Love it!! 🙂 But seriously, I very much treasure all my time that I have gotten as an adult with my parents now and try so hard not to take any of it for granted, because I know as you said (in your post) that I will blink and this too will be long gone and behind me.
lrconsiderer says
It's so true that the relationships with our parents have the potential to change and grow into something much more akin to friendship than we ever imagined 🙂
Janine Huldie says
I know Lizzi and completely 100% agree with you on this!! 🙂
day-with-kt.com says
I have no doubt that your girls will feel that way about you and Kevin in a few years. I used to stress a lot about that because I don't have a good relationship with my mom very few good memories from my childhood. I never wanted to repeat history with my own kids. I hope that we will always be friends – they are some of my favorite people to spend time with these days.
Janine Huldie says
Kim, same here and my husband and my kids are truly some of my favorite people to spend time with, too. And just so sorry you didn't have a good relationship with your own mom, but does sound like you have not repeated that, having a great relationship with your own boys!! 🙂
pfchico says
How lovely, Janine. This is a beautiful post. As a grown up, I definitely learned to appreciate my mother. After having my daughter, I had also a new found respect and even deeper love for her. I only wish that she were here for me to tell her. Your kids will get there too.
Janine Huldie says
Thanks hun and will say I wish your were mom was here too, but think she totally knew how you felt about her in my heart of hearts 🙂
Ruchira says
first of all beautiful pix, J9…I absolutely admired each one of them
i agree times have changed and the relationship we shared with our parents and what it is now is so different and mature…keeping my fingers crossed for ours with our kids.
beautiful post 🙂
Janine Huldie says
Thanks Ruchira and I know crazy how times did indeed change. Still sometimes can't believe it myself and wish you a wonderful weekend now!! 🙂
Kristi Campbell says
Aw, Janine, the ending to this made me cry. You're so right that holding out and unconditional love comes above all others. I love the photo of you and your mom (you look so much alike!!) and especially the one of you with Kevin and the girls at the end, because YES. Family. We don't always appreciate them when we're young, but you nailed how it comes to be eventually.
Janine Huldie says
So to make you cry Kristi, but I couldn't help but share how much as an adult I do love and cherish the relationships I have with my family now. And as for my mom and I, I have heard that since I was younger and must admit now, I smile every time I hear how much I look like her and am so thankful that I do!! 🙂
tamaralikecamera says
You look so much like your mom!! Oh my god!!
I remember before I moved to California spending a lot of time with my parents and feeling so desperate like I was losing them forever. I felt like they wouldn't be "mine" ever again, in the same way.
And now I'm back from that adventure with a few new ones of my own, and they are my parents, and they are my kids' grandparents.
And we all have each other so much.
And I'm so thankful for this time.
Janine Huldie says
Same here Tamara and I just thank god everyday that I still have my parents and have more time with them. And love that you too said I look like my mom. Seriously heard this growing up all the time and like I said to Kristi it truly makes me smile now to know I look like her (especially how much I do look up to her)!!
irkedmommy says
It is amazing how much things have changed!
It's amazing how different we can be, yet how much we take in from our parents.
When we were kids, we were pretty much on our own because our mom worked all the time.
Now, here I am, a stay at home mom and I think that has a lot to do with my mom!
Crazy!
Janine Huldie says
Totally crazy and my mom stayed at home with us and it drove me crazy as a kid believe it or not, because she was always there and sometimes I would just want my space, but now as an adult I am so thankful she was and now, I too am at home with my kids. So go figure!! 🙂
tinarobmorley says
That's a beautiful story! Thanks for sharing and encouraging us in our roles as parents.
Janine Huldie says
My pleasure Tina and thank you for stopping by and linking up, too!! 🙂
Brittnei Washington says
This is so beautiful. It's true that we see things so differently once we start our own families. That's so awesome that you spend so much time with your parents. Everyone lives pretty far from us. I think I'm loving that we have found family in the fellowship we just started attending. I believe I will grow closer to them since we are starting to spend at least once a week with them all 🙂
Janine Huldie says
So happy for you that you have found a semblance of a family in the fellowship and truly does make all the difference 🙂
Karen says
sniffles…blows nose….sniffles…I totally get how you feel Janine. I would be lost without my parents and so angry at all the teen years I wasted being angry or embarrased by them. I truly hope I have the same adult relationship with my son, I do worry tht being a boy he will not be as tight wtih me, but I do hope.
My recent post Why Was I in Such a Rush?
Janine Huldie says
Karen, I think we both had this effect on each other with our posts this week and our neck and neck even. But seriously, I know I can't believe how many years in my youth I did waste and am seriously now trying to make that up as I go being an adult. And I truly hope our kids are so very close to us as adults, too now!! 🙂
massholemommy says
Things were definitely different back in the day when we were kids. I see my parents a lot now that I am a grown up, too, lol. We only live about 20 minutes from each other.
MelChi says
When we stayed closer to my parents we saw them a lot more a few years ago and that was great. Things are definitely different when you move out the house! And yes, completely agree with you – you DO realise how much they did for you back then. I love the last pic, so precious! 🙂
Janine Huldie says
Thanks Melanie and I know I still can't believe how much my mom has done for me over the years. Definitely crazy when I do allow myself to think about it!! 🙂
Alexa says
I certainly never would have guessed when I was a teen that one day I would enjoy hanging out with my parents!!!
Janine Huldie says
Me either Alexa. Trust me, I was definitely a handful as a teen and if they said white, I would say black. So, seriously could have knocked me over with a feather on this one!! 🙂
Janine Huldie says
I know Robin, seriously can't believe how full circle we have come on this one! 🙂
Lisa says
I've experienced first-hand how staying the course as a parent pays off. During those teenage years you may wonder where you went wrong, but with time most kids come to appreciate their parents.
Janine Huldie says
Thank you for sharing this and does totally give me hope that if I stay the course my girls and I will be close in their adult years 🙂
ginnymarie says
What a sweet post! It's so encouraging for parents who might be going through some difficult years! I just love that picture of you and your mom on your wedding day. Beautiful!
Janine Huldie says
Aww, thanks for saying that and definitely pray I give hope to others not his, because I was so a miserable teen with my parents and now I just totally see the errors of my ways and am so thankful for them 🙂
Kenya G. Johnson says
So sweet! Makes me nostalgic for a visit home. I have no doubt that I would have been the same way with my family but my husband and I moved a month after we got married and have not been back (to live). So the hanging out is when they come to visit us. When we go there as a family it's usually me and my husband hanging out while my parents stay with Christopher. I am surprised as a grownup that my daddy and I are friends. I didn't see that coming at all when I was a teenager. I thought we would "hate" each other forever. Today I completely understand the boundaries and think my parents did very well too.
Janine Huldie says
Kenya, I feel the same way about my father. I thought we would totally hate each other forever back when I was a teen, but very surprised by the fact that we are friends now. And like you I also think my parents did a great job raising us and only hope I am doing have as good with my girls now, too!! 🙂
Tarana says
My relationship with my mom took an about turn right after my son was born! It was only after it that I really began to understand her. You're right about spending every moment with our kids because they do grow up fast.
Janine Huldie says
Same here and I do think having kids definitely makes us look and act differently towards our moms (at least it did for me) and I know I seriously wish I could slow down how quickly my kids are growing up now!!
Rosey says
What a sweet post. And I love the family picture!!
Janine Huldie says
Aww, thanks so much Rosey!! 🙂
Sandy_Ramsey says
This is such a great post and the pictures are awesome! I love what you did here! It is so true about parent/child relationships changing through the years. I just keep telling myself this on the days when things are haywire. I love the relationship you describe with your parents…you are so blessed, Janine and I am so happy for you!
My recent post Being Grown Up
Janine Huldie says
Aww, thanks Sandy and I really was happy I could that I do have a great relationship with my parents as an adult after the many years as a teen and young adult that I was such a pain int he butt to them!!
Billybuc says
Interesting question….I guess I would say the most unexpected part was having to grow up so quickly with my dad dying when I was twenty leaving me to support my mother. I wasn't ready for that kind of responsibility and I had to learn quickly from trial and error. There, I actually answered one of these. LOL Have a great weekend Janine.
Janine Huldie says
Bill, I did know a bit about this from our friendship and know this must have been not only a hard time of your life, but also a culture shock as well. Thinking of you today and thank you for answering the question so honestly. Wishing you a wonderful weekend, too now.
@togetherforlife says
What a great post. Love the pictures you shared…and the relationship you have with your parents.
Janine Huldie says
Thank you so much for your kind words and I feel very blessed to have the relationship I do have with my parents now!! 🙂
anothercleanslate says
I'm a big fan of cooking too which I never thought would happen.
Love that wedding photo of you!!
Janine Huldie says
I know me neither about the cooking and thank you so much Kate 🙂
vitatrain4life says
It's so true!! I never got to spend that kind of quality time with my mom and beyond the worst. I'm so lucky to still have my dad and a wonderful stepmom. My favorite thing to do is hang out with them and, to my kids, they are the absolute best!!! It's so nice to read how much you love and cherish your parents. I too hope my boys will someday have the same relationship with me and my husband. There's just nothing like it!
Janine Huldie says
There is nothing like it and Allie, I am so glad you have your dad and step-mom and know how much you miss your mom. I seriously couldn't even try to imagine and really just happy that you do have a close relationship with your dad and step-mom, too. 🙂
Chris / HyeThymeCafe says
Well, I can't say that either of my parents was/are cool, but my Dad was a very down to Earth kind of guy and they definitely both had/have a lot to share! I especially miss having my Dad around to poke around in antique shops with. He was great for educating me on all those old gadgets I couldn't figure out. My sister and I just laugh at things and make up uses for them, but Dad would come along and let us know the real deal. As for Mom, although the genes didn't pass down to me I'm afraid, I have always said she could give Martha Stewart a run for her money. Mom is extremely talented when it comes to cooking, sewing, knitting, decorating, gardening, etc. I, on the other hand, couldn't grow a chia pet, and although I'm pretty good in the kitchen and can sew (passably, but free-style, not by pattern), I couldn't knit to save my life!
Janine Huldie says
I never could grow a chia pet either, but still have to say I am just so happy to see you back today, Chris and hope you will join us more often now, too!! 🙂
susanzutautas says
That last picture of you Kevin and the girls is really nice! I was racking my brain today because I couldn't for some reason come up with an ending to the sentence and then finally it hit me 🙂
Janine Huldie says
I am so glad it finally did hit you and you did join us today!! 🙂
notinjersey says
I love that you've become friends with your parents as you grew up. I do feel like I can talk to mine better now, but it's hard when we're not local, I guess!
Janine Huldie says
I can't even imagine not being local to my parents, but totally has to be hard and have thought about moving away, but I just couldn't do it in the end.
stephanie2006 says
You SO look like your mom, Janine 🙂 I totally agree that the best thing in the world was watching TV all day back in the days, and sometimes the girls are the same now. That's fine for drairy days, but on sunny days, they better get their butts outside and play properly 🙂
Janine Huldie says
Aww, thanks so much Stephanie and I know once it actually does warm up here and so hope to get my kids outdoors more again.
Sarah says
My dad always says we have it totally backwards – we should send kids away for high school, when they're absolutely vile, and then let them live at home during college when they have actually turned into decent human beings who appreciate their parents.
Thanks for letting me cohost this week! 🙂
Janine Huldie says
I love your dad's theory and think he is truly onto something there. And seriously was so happy to have you co-host this week and hope you will co-host again with us int he future, too!! 🙂
jasteck says
Beautiful post, Janine. Your relationship with your parents is such a blessing. It is amazing how much our relationships mature and grow as we do. My son and I have a closer friendship now that he's an adult. It's so wonderful!
Janine Huldie says
Thank you so much and you gave me hope for my kids too hearing that you are now closer with your son as an adult, too 🙂
Katia says
Oh, look for sweet deals on yard sales with your mom sounds like my kind of mommy-daughter hangout! I used to love to hang out with mom and shop together when we were living in the same country. And of course most of us go through teenage angst, but I have no doubt your daughters will feel the same way about you and Kevin as you do about your parents. What a sweet post and as always – gorgeous photos!
Janine Huldie says
Aww, thanks Katia and totally love shopping with my mom and do hope my girls will feel similar to Kevin and I when they grow up now 🙂
Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama says
What an awesome post, Janine! When I became a mother, I remember being struck by absolute awe and appreciation for my mother. We've always been close, but motherhood brought us closer together. I knew how much I loved the little girl in my arms, and at that moment, I realized that my mom felt the same way about me. I'll never look at her the same.
My recent post 5 Ways Motherhood Makes Me a Better Runner
Janine Huldie says
Thank you Nicole and yes I know exactly what you are talking about. My mom always talked about how much she wanted a girl and me that when she first had me she held me looking at me and just couldn't believe it. I truly didn't get it until I had my first daughter (and then my second, too). I sat looking and taking in every feature and moment of that in the first days especially!! 🙂
Elizabeth says
It’s a shame that we have to reach our thirties to realize that we have a finite amount of time with our parents. I feel like I’m making up time for the past 15 years that I tried to avoid them. It’s the irony of growing up, huh? Great post!
Janine Huldie says
I know Elizabeth and I spent too much of my life running from this and thankful I didn't realize too late here by any means! Thank you for your kind words and also for joining us this week, too!! 🙂
dianeroark says
Janine,
I too think your mom and dad did a great job raising you. You are so thoughtful. I love your heart for family.
Have a wonderful week,
Diane Roark
Janine Huldie says
Aww, thank you so much Diane and I do very much credit my parents for the way I am, because they never gave up on me even when I was a complete pain in the rear! But thank you so very much again and huge hugs to you!! 🙂 🙂
another jennifer says
What a sweet post, Janine. Thank you for this!
Janine Huldie says
My pleasure and thank you, Jennifer!! 🙂
stephsprenger says
I too love spending time with my parents, and it's so strange to imagine them at MY age, with me as a young child! That picture of you as a baby- your mom looks so much like you!
Janine Huldie says
I know definitely strange to think of our parents as young with us, but sure some day our kids will probably think the same about us, too. And thank you 🙂
Rea says
You're such a lovely bride Janine! And I sure feel the same way you do about my parents. I guess it comes with being a parent too — we become more understanding and we can already relate with what our parents did and taught us when we were still kids and young. 🙂
Janine Huldie says
So true Rea and thank you so much for your lovely words and comment 🙂
Nellie says
You have amazing parents!! I have no doubt that you will be just as fantastic to your girls. Isn't it funny how much our priorities change? I think I was right there with you and bugs bunny 🙂 I love that baby picture of you!
Janine Huldie says
Thanks again Nellie and you are so right about how my priorities changed completely after having my girls, too 🙂
lizzy says
This is such a beautiful post, Janine. I love your photos and I love how you describe how your relationship with your parents has evolved. They seriously did an amazing job with you because your beautiful soul just shines through everything you write on your blog and in your comments on other people's blogs and in your family photos. xx
Janine Huldie says
Aww, Lizzy thank you so much for saying such lovely and kind things here about me and my family. I just feel so blessed to have my family and to me everything else is just the cherry on top (even in the craziest moments, too!). 🙂
realhousewife says
Our family is very tight…I talk to my mom three times a day on the phone and we meet up for lunch and shopping almost weekly. I've always enjoyed that!
The most surprising thing to me about being grown up is that someone leaves me in charge during the day!! HAHA! I get to make decisions and everything…it's crazy! It's like the warden leaving the craziest person charge of the facility! Lol
Janine Huldie says
Lol, Kelly you just made me totally goggle, but seriously you are one of my favorite crazy people and love you to pieces!! 🙂
Jess says
It's amazing how we appreciate our parents once we become parents. I'm more close with my mother now than I ever thought possible. It's weird that a baby helped me to get over all my issues with my mom. Now we are friends!
Janine Huldie says
I know Jess and trust me I feel the same way about this completely!! 🙂
dishofdailylife says
I loved the photo of your mom and dad holding you when you were a baby – you look so much like your mom! It's interesting how our relationships with our parents change…I don't see my parents that often because they live on the other side of the country, but my in laws live next door.
Janine Huldie says
When I read that your in-laws lived right next store, I seriously couldn't help, but think of Everybody Loves Raymond 🙂
dishofdailylife says
That show was really funny, but they are nothing like that. Honestly I was worried, but it's been a pleasure. We have lived next door to them for over 20 years.
Janine Huldie says
I am so glad to hear that they are nothing like that and a pleasure, because that show always gave in-laws and living close a bad rap.
canigetanotherbottleofwhine says
Man, I remember those cartoons too. So much fun on a Saturday morning. I miss those days – it's not the same for my kids. We have Netflix.
Janine Huldie says
I know it truly isn't the same and we don't have Netflix. So, I just pretty much live on memories at this point!
gigigirl says
I just saw this and glad I didn't miss it. What a lovely homage to your parents and to family life. My best memories are the evening we would all gather at Nanny and Pop's house, and those summer evenings on the stoop with neighbors as well. You are so right….time spent hanging out with family members beats all the TV! I think you and Kevin will reap the fruits of your labors in building close family ties with the girls…..and modeling what it is to be a member of a family. Keep up the good work. Love you…….xxoo
Janine Huldie says
Totally does and so happy to bring back good memories for you too with this post. Love you and xoxo 🙂
gigigirl says
Now you are both mothers and have a lot more in common! You can learn a lot from each other too. xxoo
Janine Huldie says
So very true and thanks Aunt Gloria 🙂 xoxo!!
catherine gacad says
janine, such wisdom you have in this post. obviously you had great parents because you are a great mom yourself! even though we may not have appreciated our parents at all times…we eventually come around! i've so been there. and i hope that i'll do the same for when i'm parenting. that i'll just keep loving unconditionally even when he or she is an awful teenager.
Janine Huldie says
Trust me I hear you on that and frightened for the teen years just a bit here now!! 😉