This Mom's Confessions

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Over Sharing “Little Emma” Style

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Many times on here, I tend to over share more about Lily, because she is the more loud and definitely more crazy of my two children.

Lily Being Lily!
Lily Being Lily!

For god sakes, even her laugh is ridiculous and actually has my mom and I convinced that she has my grandfather’s laugh (my mom’s dad). He literally had this laugh that was so memorable and when he passed away I never thought I would hear it again. Honestly, this made me so very sad when we lost him all those years ago.

Then, Lily came about and that laugh is now back in my life!

But I digress and want to over share about Emma today.

Don’t let Emma fool you she may be the quieter of my two, but she sometimes can be very strong and independent. Two qualities I not only admire, but am so proud of her for.

I was a lot like Emma as a child and was the quiet, shy and reserved little girl, who was always thinking things through before acting, unlike Lily who just does it and then gets upset later.

But every once in awhile Emma’s independent streak proves to override her pensive quality and she reacts.

About a week ago, I picked up Emma from school. One of her two teachers pulled me aside in the hall to tell me two stories from the 2 1/2 hours that she was in school that day.

The first was during the time that the children were learning to write the letter “O”. See they are working on the circular type letters and this week it was “O”, which to Emma is a circle, which she thinks she not only knows the shape, but how to draw, too.

During this time she was practicing, but apparently the teacher tried to offer help and guidance. Independent Emma struck and pushed the teacher’s hand away. When the teacher confronted her and asked her why, quiet Emma took hold and wouldn’t give much of an answer.

So, the teacher asked her if she could do the “O” by herself and Emma sheepishly said, “No.”

The teacher then told her that is why she was trying to help her and if she did know how to do it, then to just tell the teacher, but to please not push her hand away, because that action wasn’t very nice.

I was told Emma looked like she wanted to cry and the teacher felt so bad, she backed off then so as not to upset her.

A little while later the kids were playing and the teacher caught petite, “little Emma” (how she is known in school), kicking a boy in her class.

Of course, the teacher asked Emma why she did this and quiet Emma once again took hold and wouldn’t answer, but started to cry hysterically. She was told that this wasn’t nice, but then again the teacher felt awful that “little Emma” was crying.

I told the teacher, she was right and that both instances Emma was indeed wrong and I would talk to her. I don’t want her to be fresh to her teacher nor do I want her hurting another one of her classmates physically. So, I knew I had to get to the bottom of this.

And I did just that when we got home and explained how both behaviors were “Not Nice” (Lily’s words) and that sometimes we need help. Also, that she should definitely not kick or raise her hand to anyone else in her class ever, because if someone did that to her, how would she feel?

She said that she would cry and feel bad. I also told her that this little boy’s (yes she kicked a boy a bit bigger then her) mom would probably not want her playing with her son anymore if she did this again.

She never told me why she kicked the little boy, but I did get why she pushed her teacher’s hand away out of her, because she wanted to do it herself. Again, I reiterated that the teacher was only trying to help her and that she needs to tell the teacher if she feels she doesn’t need help, not push her hand away.

However, Kevin got it out of her why she kicked this little boy when he got home that night. The reason, for her aggression, was plain and simple, he had been being mean to both her other girl cousins (in her class) and she was sticking up for them.

This little, skinny nothing who at 4 years old barely weighs 30 lbs, soaking wet took it upon herself to stick up for her cousins, who in her eyes are her friends and were being treated mean by this little boy.

Now, I know she shouldn’t kick or hit anyone, but somewhere my inner, bitchy, independent self was just a bit proud of her. She really is such a brave, strong little girl, who clearly could hold her own, when she needs to. Again not advocating her physically hurting anyone, but in a way it was nice to know she could totally hold her own if she needed.

"Little Emma" Totally Impresses Me with How Strong She Really Is!
“Little Emma” Totally Impresses Me with How Strong She Really Is!

In the end, I knew I had to over share here a bit about Emma, because it was truly long overdue!  

Secret Obsession

By the way, today’s October Daily challenge #17 had me raiding my archives and re-posting something that I would want you all to read.  So click here for a flashback Emma post from last year at pre-school to catch up more with her now.

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About Janine

Janine is a published author of the books, The Mother of All Meltdowns and Only Trollops Shave Above the Knee. She has been featured on The Huffington Post, Mamapedia, Today Parenting Team and SheKnows. She also runs her own graphic design company at J9 Designs.

Reader Interactions

Comments

    • Janine Huldie says

      Tamara, I think they would totally get along and would love to see them meet now. Maybe someday soon, because I still hope we get to meet up in person, too. So true though much stronger then I ever could imagine!! 🙂

  6. Rosey says

    Aww, I don't condone condone kicking, hitting, whatever, but I'm proud of Emma too. 🙂

    Atta' girl (I mean, um… 'tsk' 'tsk'). 🙂

    Goodness that statement could get me in trouble, lol. My oldest used to get made fun of (he was overly polite and kind-hearted) and his brother was in Kindergarten w/him when he was in 5th grade. I got a call to the school because my K. punched someone in the stomach (a 5th grader) who was being mean to his brother. I was proud too. 😉 The oldest is now a big muscle-bound brute (still very kind) and I doubt anyone picks on him…ever. Pretty sure his brother who is still a lot smaller would still stick up for him though, if someone did. 😉
    My recent post The Toilet Paper Roll is on the Table

  7. Billybuc says

    Sticking up for friends and family? I'd say that is a pretty good kid you have there. Those are things you can't teach; they are part of the person and will be for life. Bravo, Emma!

  10. Amy says

    I love it. Even though it isn't nice to hurt others….you are so right about, at least she can hold her own. I hope your physical goes well today and you and Kevin get some time together. 🙂

    • Janine Huldie says

      Thanks Amy and I know I do not advocate my kids hurting anyone, but knowing why she did it and that she can hold her own did make me feel good to say the least. And I just hope it goes quickly, because I am literally a routine no-pregnant checkup, but he is also an OB, as well as a high risk doctor, so he gets a lot of these patients that need his attention. So sometimes I wait a bit to see him even when I do have an appointment. Can't complain though, because when I was high risk he was always there for me and just the best!! 🙂

  12. dishofdailylife says

    That's awesome she stuck up for her cousins. Sure I'd be upset too about the kicking but she can learn to channel it another way. And you know she is going to grow up a strong independent woman who will not be pushed around! Go Emma!

  14. Sara says

    Love that Emma stood up for her cousins. I never want Collin to bully or hit but I don't want him to just take it if someone does it to him. So yay for Emma for being brave and standing up for her friends. Btw how nice that her cousins are in her class.

    Also I just realized that all the comments you leave on my blog that I respond to via email you never see my response. So to your comment earlier yes we can be miserable together when winter comes!
    My recent post Squirrely Blogger Award & Sunshine Award

    • Janine Huldie says

      Thank you for telling me that and totally would love to be miserable with you, because I definitely think you are very good company. And it is nice that she is with her cousins and has totally helped to bring her out of her shell!! 😉

  15. stephanie2006 says

    It's funny, everyone says that my big girl is a mini-me as well 😉 I so see Lily doing what Emma did, and while we need to guide them into what is acceptable and what isn't, we should be proud of our self-confident and independence. Oh, and she's such a smart girl, taking advantage of her "Little Emma" status 😉
    My recent post A to Z Book Survey

    • Janine Huldie says

      Thank you so much Dianna and I too was totally quiet like her, but you would never know it now from me. And I truly do hope she does find her own way and have been told she is getting more outgoing and confident in school now, too!! 🙂

  17. stephsprenger says

    It's so hard when we see our kids turn feisty and assert themselves- on the one hand, it's great to know they have confidence and will stand up for themselves, but it's also embarrassing when they have "bad manners!" I hate worrying about what other people will think about my kids' behavior. :/ Also, I know this was about Emma, but loved the Lily laugh story, too! 🙂
    My recent post In The Powder Room- MOMBIEN

    • Janine Huldie says

      Stephanie, I too loved the Lily laugh story and just had to include and couldn't resist! I know exactly what you mean and hate feeling like it was something I might have done wrong or didn't teach them. Almost makes me feel lacking in some way as a parent.

  18. Judy Haughton-James says

    Your daughters are adorable Janine. I think Lily resembles you a lot and both girls resemble each other too. Emma is really amazing. She realized that her cousins were not being treated right and stood up for them. She is clearly a family person. It is also good when children understand what a parent is trying to say about what is right and what is wrong. I mentioned you and your blog in my latest post!:) Take care and enjoy the rest of your week.
    My recent post A Wonderful Coincidence!

    • Janine Huldie says

      Thank you for the mention, Judy and totally was heading your way now, too. Trying to catch up after a long, but fun day out with Kevin and the girls. But seriously can't thank you enough for all your kind words here about both my little girl 🙂

  21. GrowUpMadison says

    You go Emma! I'm proud of her too for sticking up for her cousins. She wasn't being mean she was defending someone from someone bigger than they were. I hope Madison is able to do the same when she gets older. Right now she's a little bully with her bigger brothers. 🙂
    My recent post Waterbabies: Giggly Wiggly Review

  22. gigigirl says

    Emma is a smart, brave girl. A lawyer in the making? She has a strong will but such a sweet way about her. You and Kevin are guiding her the right way so she'll learn to use that strength to her advantage. You gave her her special space…..thanks for sharing. Love, Aunt Gloria xxoo

    • Janine Huldie says

      Totally my pleasure in sharing Aunt Gloria and I know she really just has that special way about her that I can't help, but feel proud of her and know she is going to go far in this world. Might be biased, because I am her mom, but just can't help it. Thanks as always and love you tons, too!! xoxo 🙂

  23. Mary Belle says

    I believe little Emma is a really wonderful and nice girl and would never have bad intentions in doing anything. 🙂 It's amazing how little kids learn how to protect people important to them and stick up for themselves. 🙂 But of course she wouldnt be like this if it werent for you both. 😀

  24. spiritedlife says

    My son always has permission to protect himself from physical harm or help someone else, who cannot or will not do it themselves. We've discussed which situations where it's appropriate, and so far, he has followed through. Oddly, he's a lot quicker to help someone else than he is to protect himself. You've got a great little girl there!
    My recent post The Days Start to Run Together…another #FTSF

    • Janine Huldie says

      Thanks April and I think it is awesome that you have had that conversation with your son, because at least he knows what is and isn't appropriate. And I know interesting that they will always defend someone else before themselves!

  26. Jodi Flaherty says

    I definitely over share on Hayden for the same reasons! 🙂 Henry is just a quiet man of mystery even if he is a little troublemaker! Hayden is social, funny and has quirks that I love to share!

    I too was so proud to read about Emma practicing her assertiveness and exercising boundaries. She will learn in time to balance it all!
    My recent post #AskAwayFriday with MrsTee Love, Life & Laughter!

    • Janine Huldie says

      Catherine, you and I would have gotten along perfectly. As Emma so takes after me and I was the quiet, shy girl in school. But you are right watch out for the quiet ones, because we can totally turn out to be feisty!! 🙂

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