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PMS: A Cruel Joke For Women

Filed Under: Crazyiness, Married Life Tagged With: , , ,

PMS is got to be one of the cruelest jokes that god has done to women and is a real bitch.  I can tell you from experience that during this time of the month, that I am truly just not myself (yes it isn’t pretty!).

It is bad enough that I am a gemini astrologically speaking and definitely fit the bill with two distinct personalities.  Even from the time, I was a kid I apparently had trouble making up my mind.  My mom will always tell the story of how I asked for something to eat and then in the next breath turned to her and said, “I don’t even like that and not sure why I asked for it!”

So this indecisiveness only gets worse when I am PMSing.  And that is just one of many things that do occur that could drive those around me, especially Kevin, insane, plus make me uncomfortable, as well.

I am pretty sure I am not alone and that this phenomenon occurs to so many women.  Hell, I have read countless stories that would back up my claim.  Many have similar symptoms, but not all have the same.

How to Deal with PMS

So here are my top favorite things that I just loathe about this time of the month, known as PMS:

  1. The Constant Mood Swings:  Seriously I have enough of the these all month long with as I already shared being a gemini.  I not only have two personalities on even a good day, but at this point I usually have my own 50 shades of crazy to go around.
  2. The Lovely Cravings:  These cravings are actually way worse then anything I could have ever experienced while being pregnant both times.  During that time, I was nauseous for weeks on end that food wasn’t all that appealing to be honest.  But when I am PMSing, I am never nauseous, but only hungry all the time.  I could eat and eat never feeling full.  I swear I am like the bottomless pit.  I have been know to eat a complete taco dinner and then want to munch on Fruit Loops (and I don’t even really like Fruit Loops).  So not good for trying to watch my weight as spring and summer are just around the corner!
  3. The Bloat:  Along with the cravings and the binge eating comes a lovely bloat, which makes me look like I am about 5 months pregnant.  I am 5’2” and petite.  On a good day, I am really not overweight, but for having had two kids have heard some nice compliments in the past about my body.  But at this time of the month, nothing I can do makes it any better, because not only am I retaining water, but I am practically consuming the amount for two people that yes this is why I look like there may very well be pregnant again (I am not I assure you).  So not a pretty sight and when you are trying to motivate yourself to tone up again not a great motivator in the least!
  4. Headaches:  In my twenties, I started getting migraines during this time of the month.  They are the worst kind and nothing I can take helps.  I was even prescribed prescription medication to help, but alas that didn’t do anything, but made me feel like I was a narcoleptic crazy person.  You guessed it, all I wanted to do was sleep.  So, now I just suffer through and count down until my cycle begins a new.  And by suffer, I have headaches off and on for a week. As a writer this is the worst to try to stare at your computer and indeed write, but I still do what I have to do.  Just grin and bear it.
  5. Backaches:  Not as bad as I guess this could be.  Considering I have suffered from sciatica even without my period in the past.  But still can’t be achy and just a real nuisance if you ask me. This one I probably shouldn’t complain about, because I was nine months pregnant with sciatica.  I couldn’t lay or sit down and standing was the only comfortable position.  Seriously, do you know how miserable having to stand for long periods of time when you are so very pregnant?  Yeah, this has to be one of the worst things to be experienced.  But I digress, PMS backaches are actually a cakewalk comparatively speaking, but still so not wanting to exercise right about now either.  And I have heard all the crap that exercise makes it feel better. Just spare me (see that is the PMS talking!).

So there you have it for one week out of a month, I am a moody, craving, bloated, headache and backache prone PITA or pain in the ass (my husband lovely term).  I owe the one person (my husband again), who puts up with me daily an a apology, I suppose. But then again the month is still young and sure he will do something to annoy the crap out of me shortly and still yet this too shall pass!

See what I mean PMS is a real, indecisive bitch literally. Still, aren’t you glad you don’t have to live with me for this one week every month! But then again only a woman could endure this brand of torture monthly and still be a pleasure to live with 3 out of 4 weeks a month.

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About Janine

Janine is a published author of the books, The Mother of All Meltdowns and Only Trollops Shave Above the Knee. She has been featured on The Huffington Post, Mamapedia, Today Parenting Team and SheKnows. She also runs her own graphic design company at J9 Designs.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  2. Michelle G says

    That's spooky I am pondering PMT in the blog post I'm writing (especially after making such an idiot of myself this weekend in front of friends lol). And I feel your pain with the sciatica, people think you're mad when you're upright, and keep telling you to sit down. It doesn't help. Up, down, lying – no difference 🙁

    • Janine Huldie says

      Michelle, I truly hate having back issues and sciatica is the worst. And you are right how people just don't get it. Laying down does not help, because eventually I have to get back up and seriously when it flares you can't get back up. It is the WORST!!!

  3. Dani Ryan says

    Ugh. I hate PMS. I find it's gotten worse since I became a mom, which is probably due to the fact that I'm not in a working environment all day where I'm forced to be pleasant. 🙂 Like you, I'm not a big person, but the bloating is INSANE once a month. The cramps are bad, too, but I find I'm okay if I take Advil as soon as they start.

    My PMS has started for the month too (ah, that would explain my mood during the dinner hour last night!), so I'm right there with you. 🙁

    • Janine Huldie says

      Dani, totally sounds like my mood last week all week!! Seriously, Midol did help a bit and thought I would give it a try. I haven't sued it since I was a teen, but was so desperate would have tried anything. Lo and behold it did help the headaches, but still had the bloat and the lovely personality, too!! I feel your pain and at the very least thanks for sharing. We aren't alone and at have each other to commiserate!!

  5. Cyndi says

    I so don't like that time of the month, either. I am so hormonal and prone to fits of laughter followed by sobbing. LOL. I'm lucky that I don't get migraines, though. I've gotten bad headaches from time to time – I am so sorry on that one!

    • Janine Huldie says

      Oh I hear you the range of emotions Cyndi. Truly not fun. As for the migraines, I only started getting them in my twenties and had a reprieve with two pregnancies, but they are no back with a vengeance. I have sinus issues, too so this only compounds it. Thanks as always though!!

  6. Kenya Johnson says

    Your #2 for true for me as well. I loved to drink stuff, I would go to Sonic twice a day for slushee of some sort but I didn't crave anything like I do with PMS. I wish it was the reverse and I could be on a liquid diet now. In a future TALU I'll have to share my ten good days of the month that my three personalities have (Me, Myself & I) We really feel for you on what you and your twins are talking about 😉

    • Janine Huldie says

      Kenya, I would have relished the fact to have cravings and not be nauseous during my pregnancies, but alas I was so green during both that food was anything, but appetizing. I am with you and wish for a bit of a liquid diet at this stage, but then again two months ago I had a touch of something and felt that nauseous green feeling for about a week off and on and remembered all too quickly why I hated it so. Thanks Kenya and look forward to that post you are talking about linking up to TALU 🙂

  7. Bill says

    You start a blog off with the initials PMS and I picture half the men refusing to read any longer. LOL The three letters that can make a man break out in a cold sweat.

    It is a cruel joke and truly no laughing matter. Hang in there, Mom!

    • Janine Huldie says

      Sorry Bill and you sound like Kevin. He just hates the word and the time of the month of course, too!! Thanks though for reading and commenting even though this is truly not a fun topic for any man to read or deal with.

  8. Melanie Chisnall says

    I am right there with you Janine! It is a cruel, cruel joke and it's not funny. Men just don't understand. It's not fun at all to have 5 different moods in the space of 30 minutes. Really, it's not. And yes, for me the bloating is also the worst because I'm also short and petite. The cravings aren't so bad, neither are the cramps…I can do it all if only there weren't mood swings. They're the worst for me. I literally want to claw and draw blood one day a month and I warn my husband to keep a safe distance. (Seriously). Lol. Sounds like you're doing great with your Slim down to Summer program…keep it up! 10 min is better than nothing 🙂 I only managed 20 this morning but it was more than enough!

    • Janine Huldie says

      Thanks for sharing Melanie and I am so with you on just getting quite bitchy for at least one day if not tow during this time. And as for Sim by the Summer, I am trying and I agree 10 minutes is better than nothing 🙂 Thanks!!

  9. Emily Cappo says

    Love that PMS Explained sign above…the one that applies best to me is #1..I'm a total bi-atch so watch out!! I have some friends who get some bad migraines and I know those can be horrible…hang in there!

    • Janine Huldie says

      Lol, Emily. Yes I become a complete bitch too and pity those like Kevin around now in my saner moments. I loved that sign and when I was looking for a graphic this fit so perfectly I couldn't help myself!! 🙂

  10. Jane Marsh says

    Do you chart yourself and know when your crazy and mood swings? Cause I do find knowing when that day is coming and planning for it (chocolate! whipped cream! — and ok, you want to get slim for the summer, but not without chocolate, right?) really helps. And there is an app for that…

    • Janine Huldie says

      I did chart when i was trying to conceive Jane, but now I am on the pill so my cycle is truly like clockwork. The extra estrogen makes for interesting times though, lol!! The chocolate sounds heavenly no matter what time of the month though and very much agree with you that!! 🙂

  11. Chris HyeThymeCafe says

    For me it apparently brings out stupidity! I mangled my back years ago in a car accident, so the backaches don't tip me off – I get them anyways, but whenever I am shopping and buy some sort of candy bar, I should know by now that chocolate to me automatically means it will be showing up the next day. Of course, at the time, I always just think the candy looks/sounds like a good idea at the time. I'll apparently never learn! [#TALU]

    • Janine Huldie says

      Chris, so sorry about the backaches and can say I can relate, because I do have my own issues even when it isn't that time of the month. I actually go to a chiropractor weekly for this reason. As for the cant, I am so with you on this and should totally know better, but can't help myself either!! 🙂 Thanks so very much for sharing!!

  12. Kat Biggie says

    You only weigh 108 and you're trying to lose weight???!?!??!?!?!? You're about to see my PMS kick in!! 🙂 Good for you for exercising and getting healthy, and yes, we all deal with that awful joke of PMS. Voted! 🙂

    • Janine Huldie says

      Alexa, I know I am small and petite, but I still have my trouble areas and that is what I am trying to wrk on by watching my diet, because I can truly put on 5 pounds just by snacking, lol!! Thank you for the votes and have done the same for you, too 🙂

  14. Stephanie Sprenger says

    Well, I am right there with you…this very second! I agree with every single one of your complaints- PMS is the worst. This is also the first PMS since I weaned my youngest last week, so I was in tears on and off all day Sunday! 🙁 By the way, I should probably participate in some sort of Slim by Summer program. I have no excuses anymore!

  15. Janine Huldie says

    Thanks Amy first for the comment and for the share, too!! I am happy to know I am not the only one who is indecisive. I know this can drive Kevin crazy even on good day. But truly nice to know it isn't just me!! 🙂

  17. Stacy Harris says

    I hear you on this one… let me tell you… the last two months have been a bear. I don't know if my body is going through a 7 year cycle change or what.. but lately not only have the mood swings been a bear but I have been dealing with this horrible backache. Normally I don't have bad PMS… this month… has not been normal. UGH!!!

    • Janine Huldie says

      Oh I have heard of a seven year cycle change and had a bit of that kind of change back in my twenties. What I wouldn't give for a change that made it like nothing was happening. Non-existent symptoms would be so welcome at this point!!!

  19. Kera says

    You always make me laugh Janine! I never had bad PMS symptoms, but let me tell ya, what I'm going through now {if you know what I mean lol} is basically as horrible as what you described!

  20. Janine Huldie says

    Lol, Julie that sounds about right and for me it M&M's still left over from potty training Lily and a box of fruit loops (I don't even like them, but couldn't stop eating). That box got annihilated needless to say, lol!! Sounds like our weeks with similar with this one though!!

  21. Rachel Harper says

    You're awesome Janine. I luckily don't usually suffer from pms, which all my friend's hate me for. I think no pms was a trade off for having a mustache I need to wax. I'd prefer the pms.

    • Janine Huldie says

      Thanks Rachel and I will say this I don't have a mustache, but during both my pregnancies I kept having one weird hair grow from my chin. Not sure if it was all the extra hormones, but that no longer happens. So who knows, but I can take some of these symptoms better than others, but the headache is up there as my least favorite!!

  22. Ruchira says

    PMS could get tough for some. I admire Kevin for putting up with it 🙂

    Good luck with your summer program…I am sure you can achieve your goal…yeah!
    voted for ya!

  23. Debbie McCormick says

    I haven't had a period in close to a year. Go ahead – send some hate mail. BUT I fell your pain. I know exactly all those feelings you described. It was awful. (talu) (voted too)

  24. Kristi Campbell says

    UGH, you're right…PMS is the worst. I'm not sure if it's normal, but I feel like the older I get, the worse it gets. Same with the cramps. I eat like a pregnant lady, too. Thanks for the smiles.
    TALU
    Voted for you, too.

  25. Amy Perdew says

    Yes, it sucks. I suffer through around 8-9 days. I am all of the above. Mine is coming next week, so I am sure I will be moody and trying to keep the snacks away to prevent gaining more than the extra bloat is going to give me.

  26. ttoombs08 says

    Good thing it only lasts for a short while, and then you'll be back to your beautiful, happy self. 🙂 Or both of you. 🙂 Good luck on your goal to be slim by summer. You are so determined and a go getter that I have no doubt you'll master this challenge just like all the other ones that you've set your mind to. You got this!

  27. Kerry says

    I always got annoyed by men who call us all sorts of names during this time… yeah, they have to deal with US, but they don't have to deal with the ACTUAL symptoms! They have no idea what we go through! Luckily my guy is understanding. Although, I usually don't get anything more than cravings for salt and a backache.

  30. Felisa says

    Most men just don’t understand the feeling of having PMS every month. My mood swings and negative thoughts keep pestering me. I can’t help but feel depress at the end of the day that sometimes it affects my work. To prevent this, I started taking l-theanine supplement to calm my nerves. For months, its working well for me. I now need to have a good healthy habit and do some work-outs.

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