It’s lonely being the mean mommy all the time. It was a normal day and even night, as well. Most know I am a stay at home mom and am the primary (sole) parent from 8 am to around 6 pm for 5 out 7 days a week normally. I love my girls a ton, but being with them all day their needs and wants, as well as disciplining falls mostly on me.
Right before bed time the kids and Kevin are congregated in our bedroom. Emma is on Kevin’s back, while he leans over tickling Lily and singing the song “We Go Together” from Grease making up his own goofy words. The kids are having fits of laughter and are down right hysterical. I am watching this all unfold before my eyes sitting on the other side of the bed now.
When it is all over, Kevin vacated to use the bathroom and I am left for a few short moments to try to calm the girls, which is pretty much a losing battle, because both have decided they are going to play under our bed covers. At this point, the bed is becoming more of a mess, am truly exhausted and not wanting to have to clean this mess up. Silly me tries the reasoning tactic first (when will I learn).
Once that doesn’t work, I yell for them to stop and of course this does nothing. They are too far gone. I decide I need to grab Emma from under the covers. I find a pig tail and gently pull, because she is squirming all over the place and can’t seem to get her from any other angle.
Of course, she goes from laughing to bawling her eyes out in under 10 seconds flat now. You would think I had just told her that Santa Claus didn’t exist. Seriously this kid is in meltdown mode and rationally I know it is just because she is over tired now, but now I am just wishing that I left well enough alone and let them destroy my bed, because the screaming is too much for my tired self to handle.
At this point Kevin comes out of the bathroom and Emma is crying that she only wants him, not me. Both kids are treating me like I am the wicked step mother (well they have seen Cinderella more times that I can count).
God love him, he tries to reason with Emma and even tells her to apologize to me. It takes about two minutes of his cajoling to get Emma to come around, apologize and begin to indeed calm. I admit during this time, I truly felt emotionally spent and just wanted to cry. I looked at her little face, somehow was even reminded of the very first time I laid eyes on that same face after she was born and how she needed and depended on me so completely at this point in her life (ok maybe I am just a bit hormonal and got to love what hormones do to you). Now, if her eyes could have bore a whole through me though, they would have quite simply, because she was pissed off at me. Even though Kevin was in agreement with me, Emma still wasn’t annoyed at him and it was me who had that dubious distinction. And this of course is bedtime!!
But I do realize that she is a child and by tomorrow morning, when she wakes she will have indeed forgotten this and be on to bigger and better, but man for those five minutes, I was truly the hated parent or the mean mommy. And I get I am not the fun parent in her eyes.
However when all is said and done, I am reminded of an old clip from Everybody Loves Raymond, where Frank Barone explains that you know you have done a good job as a parent, when you children tell you they hate you. Frank’s exact quote is, “Let me tell you something: you want that hate. If your kids like you, you’ve failed as parents.”
So I guess, according to him, that means I am doing something right even if I am the mean mommy from time-to-time.
Now enjoy a funny clip of Frank Barone from Everybody Loves Raymond:
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